A Year Ago Today #1

"I  DIDN'T HEAR YOU SAY 'GO'," I screamed in fun at Laura as I scrambled to make up for lost time in our race to the eleventh floor. 

It was at this moment, as I was sprinting up the stairs of the Searfarers & International House, that I realized I had three new best friends. Travis and Will who were competing on the other two sets of stairs, and Laura who was timing us from the hotel lobby.

All it took was four days for us to form a bond so close. Four days of unforgettable adventures in New York City for us to share so many inside jokes. Four days for me to see that these were the people I never again wanted to live without.

How swift and easy we were able to become friends was what made me so attached. Normally, I'm super quiet with new people, my mind clogged with anxiety-ridden thoughts.  But these three were different. On the first day of our mission trip I was already letting my weirdness seep out of my bones, not caring for the first time how people were going to judge me. Maybe it was because I was older than everyone else. Maybe it was because I was in a city I'd never been to and was ready to let go. Mostly though, I think it was because the four of us were introverts. We understood each other from the beginning and felt we had a place to belong among the mass of outgoing people on the trip.

Travis and Will were already on the highest story when I finally reached them. "I gave you guys a head start," I mumbled in defeat. We spent the rest of the night riding the elevator from ground level to top floor, reciting quotes from our favorite movies, and laughing at the stupidest things. 

That was a year ago today.

In the 365 days since then, I've seen Travis eight more times, Laura four times, and Will once. It's been months since any of us have tried to contact each other.  So what happened?

How could we go from craving each other's company to rarely talking to each other at all?  I considered them my best friends, so why did I let them fall away so easily?

The answer is one I've been faced with far too many times in my life. It's not bothering to put in the effort required to keep a relationship.  It's being too comfortable with where things are to see that things are actually breaking. It's taking time you spend with someone for granted.

I hate that I don't realize these things until it's too late.

People, friendships, relationships. They're precious.  Take care of them.

I miss you.




On Repeat: "Radioactive" - Imagine Dragons (Holy frick I want to lose my virginity to this song, sink into the ocean to this song, eat brownie batter to this song, die to this song)